Lez talk money honey!
I know. You’re probably thinking um…
But, don’t be gettin’ all huffy on me now! A couple things to note before reading:
- When I’m talking about wealth, I’m not talking about needing billions of dollars. I’m talking about the kind of wealth that allows you to do the things you are called to do in life with your time and energy.
- Money is just a tool. It’s neither evil nor, virtuous. In fact, there is a power that wants you to believe it’s one or the other. Don’t believe that lie!
- It’s not about the money. But, it’s about the money.
- I used to be the world’s worst person with money. Let me explain…
When I was 21 I bought a house. I had absolutely no clue about investing or money except that I was pretty good at making it and even better at spending it.
So, I bought really old historic home that someone told me was a good investment. I was such an idiot and purchased the dang thing. Now, mind you this was in 2004 and they’d pretty much let anyone buy anything.
Then came the electric bills. $1000 one month, $800 the next. The furniture I had to buy. It broken things that needed to be fixed. The taxes that needed to be paid. All the stuff that comes with owning a house that, at 21, I was clueless about.
So, I started putting everything on credit cards. Groceries, gas, you name it. Charge it to the game, baby.
No one ever taught me about debt and the life crushing effects of having it. By the time I was 24, I didn’t even know how much debt I had. I had so many different cards and I had my head so buried in the sand and so afraid to face the truth that I just kept spending, and spending.
I would pay a little over the minimums on every card so I’d think, “oh, I’m totally getting ahead!” which, clearly I was not. And the student loan debt hadn’t even hit me yet!
Then 2007 hit and I was broke. BEYOND broke. I was $50,000 or so in debt, including my student loans and the housing market crashed. I needed out from under my house and in a hurry.
There have been more times than I can count in my life where I am fully aware that God has protected me – and this was one of them. By the grace of God, I listed my house and the first person that looked at it, made a full price offer, and bought it. Praise. The. LORD!
I imagine how different my life would look had I had to file bankruptcy and you’d think that would have shocked me into getting it together.
Wrong. I fell back into my old ways. Make money. Spend money.
I felt so fake. So inauthentic. Hiding it from the rest of the world I knew I wasn’t taking responsibility for my lack of financial knowledge and inability to control my spending. But, I didn’t have anyone in my life to teach me or keep me accountable so, childishly, I just kept on spendin’!
Then it happened.
2008. Enter: Captain Finances.
I met my now husband and knew this was the end of my charade of pretending like I knew what I was doing in life. I was an interesting mix of relieved and terrified.
I knew that the way I was living was not how I was meant to live. But when I’d open up my online bank statement and look at my checking account, I’d literally squinch my eyes close, open them really quick to look at the balance and then x out as quickly as I could.
As crazy as it sounds, I had a fear of money. And fear always leads to sin. And sin always leads to guilt and shame.
I knew that he would not let me get away with my debt or the way I was spending.
Our conversations usually started with my asking God, please send the Rapture before he asks what’s in my checking account this week!
I had so much fear around money. Things I believed about money that simply were not true. Things I’d learned in childhood and growing up that shaped my beliefs about money. We all have beliefs about money. And once I finally tapped in to and understood that,
The way you think and what you believe is producing the results you have
That’s when everything changed.
Belief: an acceptance that a statement is true or that something exists.
Ok, so are you ready to hear the lies about money that could be holding you back? Let’s get in to it!
Money Lie #1: “Someone will rescue me.”
When you believe this lie, you are just handing over your power to someone else. “Oh, when I get married, my husband will pay this off.” “My parents will pay for my down payment, car payment, etc.” This is typically rooted in fear. Fear of, I don’t know how, I’m not smart enough etc. Girl, YES YOU ARE! You and only you have the power over how you handle your money.
Money Truth #1: No one will fix this for you.
Money Lie #2: “I’m just not good with money, numbers, etc.”
This was me. I believed this lie for YEARS. Just believing this is holding you back. We act out what we believe. And the actions we take are what create our results.
Money Truth #2: “Yes, you are.”
No one came out of the womb knowing how to balance a checkbook. It’s a skill that you have to learn and you CAN learn! Have you ever been to the circus? Girl, if that chic can ride a bike on a tightrope, you can learn to budget. We live in the greatest day in age where you literally have access to any and all information you could ever need to create a life you love. Take baby steps. Just start by looking at your accounts daily. Start to build a relationship with your income and spending. Paying attention will pay off.
Money Lie #3: “People with money are evil, greedy, lucky, etc.”
How do you know that? Ask yourself who told you that. Did someone tell you that people that have wealth are ‘bad’? When we judge someone for having something (and it’s typically money) we are actually limiting our own ability and capacity to have it. It’s crazy and the absolute truth – your mind will move in the direction of your most dominant thought!
Money Truth #3: Money is a just a tool. It’s an indicator of what we value. It’s an exchange of value.
Money Lie #4: “I grew up broke, I’ve always been broke, etc.”
Remember how powerful your thoughts are! No one will value you more than you do. In the marketplace, there is always value exchange. You have value. You have worth. But, if you don’t believe that, no one else will either.
Money Truth #4: You don’t have to stay broke!
After we make some mindset adjustments, we need to increase our knowledge and skill level. If Helen Keller could learn how to read and write, pretty sure you can figure out how to make and manage money.
When I chose to take personal responsibility for where I was financially in life, that’s when things began to change. Instead of believing the money lies, I began believing and speaking the truth. My actions followed my beliefs. I drive a paid off car, have no student loans or credit card debt and I’ve now earned well over a million dollars over the last 5 years with my home-based business.
It all starts with a change in mindset.
If I can do it, you can do it.
You were made for more. Go get it!